As a single South Asian guy or girl, there’s the obvious pressure that our parents put on us to date and get married and start a family. But there’s the less obvious pressures that we put on ourselves about how we spend our evenings and weekends. Sometimes it’s fun to get dressed up, hit a bar or club with friends and grab a few drinks. But at other times, we would rather just have a low key evening at home with a few close friends or catch the latest Bollywood flick.
The pressure to do something ‘fun’ or ‘wild’ seems to be much higher when we’re single than when we’re in a relationship. Is that because we’re worried about what others will think if they find out we stayed in on a Saturday night? Or, is it because we ourselves feel that by staying home we’re not ‘cool’? It seems to be that when we’re in a relationship, it’s as cool to stay home and watch a movie as it is to go out and party till the wee hours of the morning. For some reason, we don’t seem to care as much what we’re doing on a Saturday night when we’re in a relationship. But if we’re single, there’s a pressure to get out there and meet someone and have a drunken escapade to share with others the next morning.
As much as it’s important to get out there and meet people when you’re single and looking, it’s equally important to be comfortable enough in yourself to do what makes you happy and not for the sake of appearances. Chances are, if you’re having to drag yourself out, it’ll show in your behaviour and people will pick up on that when they meet you. Let’s face it – unless a good looking vaccuum sales guy/girl shows up at your doorstep, if you want to meet someone, you need to put a focus on it but not FORCE it.